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Saturday, November 14, 2015
Dear Future Alien Anthropologists
Wednesday, November 4, 2015
The Anti-Utility of Chicken Humanity
Workers in the USA are not paid for their labor hours; They aren't paid for their effort; They aren't even paid for their production. Workers are paid for the privilege of their title. This is not pure nepotism, as is often thought, but is a more archaic concept, called simony.
Money is a lie. It doesn't store value. It stores social position, to be dispensed at the leisure of an official.
If you intend to work hard to succeed, you are going to fail. If you intend to work smarter, not harder, then you are going to fail. But if you intend to vie for a higher ecclesiastical position, then you just might succeed. The idea is not to have as a goal some sort of production, but instead, to compete for a higher position, regardless its utility.
The best you can hope for as an employee, clerical, technical, or kinetic, is not to be rewarded more for your success, but to be awarded a higher title for your success, or even for your popularity. In this sense, academia is doing the world a disservice, since they are creating an ecclesiastical barrier to promotion that cannot be purchased through merit. It can only be purchased through a dispensation of social privilege.
Let me make myself clear: You can be an excellent student; you can demonstrate your achievement through a test; you can volunteer and do everything right; but if you aren't popular and aren't the recipient of enormous social privilege in some other way, don't bother applying to medical school. It's literally the most important factor. (It was also factored into everything else you did, no matter whether you noticed.) But even if you overcome all those obstacles, not being popular will still keep you out. You'll get to the pearly gates, and God will ask, 'How did a plebeian make it this far? Need we redesign our rigging?' The medical prep books don't tell you this, but it's true and good to say.
After all that, I am left in awe at the idea, 'How many Jews did anti-Antisemitism exclude from CCUNY?' Lord Oghma, Binder of What Is Known, forgives you, my friends.
11Then I looked on all the works that my hands had wrought, and on the labour that I had laboured to do: and, behold, all [was] vanity and vexation of spirit, and [there was] no profit under the sun. 12And I turned myself to behold wisdom, and madness, and folly: for what [can] the man [do] that cometh after the king? [even] that which hath been already done. 13Then I saw that wisdom excelleth folly, as far as light excelleth darkness.
I have become wise like my teachers, who heaped mockery on unjust wounds, though I know less about medicine. I was a scientist, and you were a cleric -- and now I am a cleric.
Money is a lie. It doesn't store value. It stores social position, to be dispensed at the leisure of an official.
If you intend to work hard to succeed, you are going to fail. If you intend to work smarter, not harder, then you are going to fail. But if you intend to vie for a higher ecclesiastical position, then you just might succeed. The idea is not to have as a goal some sort of production, but instead, to compete for a higher position, regardless its utility.
The best you can hope for as an employee, clerical, technical, or kinetic, is not to be rewarded more for your success, but to be awarded a higher title for your success, or even for your popularity. In this sense, academia is doing the world a disservice, since they are creating an ecclesiastical barrier to promotion that cannot be purchased through merit. It can only be purchased through a dispensation of social privilege.
Let me make myself clear: You can be an excellent student; you can demonstrate your achievement through a test; you can volunteer and do everything right; but if you aren't popular and aren't the recipient of enormous social privilege in some other way, don't bother applying to medical school. It's literally the most important factor. (It was also factored into everything else you did, no matter whether you noticed.) But even if you overcome all those obstacles, not being popular will still keep you out. You'll get to the pearly gates, and God will ask, 'How did a plebeian make it this far? Need we redesign our rigging?' The medical prep books don't tell you this, but it's true and good to say.
After all that, I am left in awe at the idea, 'How many Jews did anti-Antisemitism exclude from CCUNY?' Lord Oghma, Binder of What Is Known, forgives you, my friends.
11Then I looked on all the works that my hands had wrought, and on the labour that I had laboured to do: and, behold, all [was] vanity and vexation of spirit, and [there was] no profit under the sun. 12And I turned myself to behold wisdom, and madness, and folly: for what [can] the man [do] that cometh after the king? [even] that which hath been already done. 13Then I saw that wisdom excelleth folly, as far as light excelleth darkness.
I have become wise like my teachers, who heaped mockery on unjust wounds, though I know less about medicine. I was a scientist, and you were a cleric -- and now I am a cleric.
Thursday, July 30, 2015
Commentary on a Patriotic Essay, Installment I: Considerations on Representative Government
Introduction
In this first installment of my new blog series, Commentary on a Patriotic Essay, I will be reading through John Stuart Mill's Considerations on Representative Government. I hope to achieve an atmosphere similar to Mystery Science Theatre, but darker and more cynical. These are troubled times for the American people.
Preface
Those who have done me the honor of reading my previous writings will probably receive no strong impression of novelty from the present volume;Admit it. You haven't read anything like this before, or if you have, you certainly didn't enjoy it. Well, I hope to make this a little more exciting for you by being an asshole while you read it. Wish me luck. I will be skipping Mill's wordy bullshit and giving you the meat of his writings.
Several of the opinions at all events, if not new, are for the present as little likely to meet with general acceptance as if they were
There's hope! John Stuart Mill was largely ignored or disputed, just like you and me.
It seems to me, however, from various indications, and from none more than the recent debates on Reform of Parliament, that both Conservatives and Liberals (if I may continue to call them what they still call themselves) have lost confidence in the political creeds which they nominally profess, while neither side appears to have made any progress in providing itself with a better.
Politics was fucked up back in Mill's day, just like it is today. The two competing political factions even called themselves the same things! Even more extra-ordinarily, they had been corrupted in exactly the same way. They caught a horrible case of the hypocrisy pox.
Yet such a better doctrine must be possible; not a mere compromise, by splitting the difference between the two, but something wider than either, which, in virtue of its superior comprehensiveness, might be adopted by either Liberal or Conservative without renouncing any thing which he really feels to be valuable in his own creed.Mill was an utter idealist, who makes the claim that creating an effective government is possible, and he says we should demand one and not compromise. Wow, well, that idea preceded basically every failed Utopia ever conceived, including Communism. But let's read more about what this terrorist has to say.
When so many feel obscurely the want of such a doctrine, and so few even flatter themselves that they have attained it, any one may without presumption, offer what his own thoughts, and the best that he knows of those of others, are able to contribute towards its formation.This is the conclusion to the Preface. Mill says that when everyone realizes that the Government is a corrupt piece of shit, anyone can point it out. Good point, Mill.
Friday, July 17, 2015
Wage Slavery: Good blog post and my comments
It had exactly zero comments, so I decided to spice up the page a bit.
Thursday, July 9, 2015
News and Updates and the Cult!
Recently, I have become aware that there is a sizable cult that encompasses an unknown yet powerful group of citizens in my city. How did I find this cult? Their headquarters was listed in the Ford navigation directory that powers my car navigation system. The name of this cult is the "Church of the Morning Star," which as many might recall, is another name for Satan. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I have uncovered a Satanic cult right here in my home city. And I have pictures!
I went to the headquarters listed in my navigation system, and guess what I found? The church was recessed deep into an ant colony like neighborhood, probably 5 to 10 turns in. Every house was almost identical, even the way the yards were cared for. Now, you might be thinking that's some kind of Home Owner's Association bylaw. Just bear with me.
I finally arrived at the headquarters, and there was absolutely nothing. There were no cars, a few people checking out my car to see who I was, and nothing else, just one big nondescript house. I checked my nav system to see if I went to the correct location, and I was right on top of it. It was the house just in front of me.
When I was looking at my nav system, I noticed there was a school called , "School of the Church of the Morning Star," which was located about 15 minutes away. At this point, I was excited that I found a cult, and I wanted to join. So I plugged the school into my nav system hoping there would be a way to talk to these people. Keep in mind that it's the middle of summer, right?
The school turned out to be in another house, in another identical neighborhood, with the same-styled yards. And this neighborhood was 15 minutes away! At the school, even though it's summer, there were several cars. I stood at the base of the driveway leading to the school house, and I could hear children and adults talking. Since no one noticed me, I decided to take pictures. Here's what I found:
I went to the headquarters listed in my navigation system, and guess what I found? The church was recessed deep into an ant colony like neighborhood, probably 5 to 10 turns in. Every house was almost identical, even the way the yards were cared for. Now, you might be thinking that's some kind of Home Owner's Association bylaw. Just bear with me.
I finally arrived at the headquarters, and there was absolutely nothing. There were no cars, a few people checking out my car to see who I was, and nothing else, just one big nondescript house. I checked my nav system to see if I went to the correct location, and I was right on top of it. It was the house just in front of me.
When I was looking at my nav system, I noticed there was a school called , "School of the Church of the Morning Star," which was located about 15 minutes away. At this point, I was excited that I found a cult, and I wanted to join. So I plugged the school into my nav system hoping there would be a way to talk to these people. Keep in mind that it's the middle of summer, right?
The school turned out to be in another house, in another identical neighborhood, with the same-styled yards. And this neighborhood was 15 minutes away! At the school, even though it's summer, there were several cars. I stood at the base of the driveway leading to the school house, and I could hear children and adults talking. Since no one noticed me, I decided to take pictures. Here's what I found:
This is a view of the school from the base of the driveway. Notice that there are several cars.
This is another angle. It shows that there are even more cars parked on the other side.
There are even more cars parked in the cul-de-sac just outside the driveway.
And those cars are parked on the other side of the cul-de-sac as well.
Well, I decided all of this was very strange. So I looked at the backsides of as many vehicles that I thought I could see without arousing suspicion. I found a marine corps license plate, and I also saw this:
Tom Price is a Republican congressman from my state. He's sort of like Ron Paul's evil twin. Also, he doesn't believe in man-made climate change and has no brain. So I learned two things about the cult, which are that one of the members is a former marine and another member voted for Tom Price. He's probably a political conservative.
My hopes were a little dashed, since I wanted the Church to engage in occult beliefs and maybe even some exciting goat sacrifices. But if they are conservatives, they might fall more under the Christian heretic cult type, for example Mormons. In any case, having a massive, sprawling, mycelium-like cult operating in your city is nothing to despair about. How exciting!
For my next post on this topic, I am going to try to join the cult! Pray for me.
Thursday, June 18, 2015
Minimum Wage in Seattle
Do not let the unexplained destroy you!
Subtract out the base minimum living cost for the median American worker from his expected earnings, and consider the new value a more meaningful income value. This is what is known as net earnings.
wage - rent - vehicle - tax - food - basic utilities (including cell phone) -security*= net earnings
* Security needs include formal protection against violent crime. But it also requires an adversarial check on security forces, like community police that regulate the official police forces, so that any one community will not be forced to abide by the laws governing the whole land. It also requires non-intrusive protection against psychic manipulation. Together,this would ensure a democratic audit of the government. We need our own army. And it needs to be populated with the wealth of a great many workers. Otherwise, we will receive insufficient disposable income from the collective net earnings to voice our opinion politically.
Our collective net earnings = the number of participating individual workers * the pittance value.
We need to change the political system from fascism to radical socialism. And we need to do so quickly! It may already be too late!
Yes, that is one of our basic needs, and we need it to survive.
Your net earnings are what you've earned after you've paid a basic living expense that cover your basic needs, such as food, shelter, air, water, and safety and health. I think you'll find that the median net earnings are a pittance value compared against the net earnings of a CEO, who earns 300x the wage of a standard worker, who is probably suffering just as much working at that necessary position. A CEO's net earnings can be tens of thousands of times greater than a worker's net earnings. We will fight them against the King. We will fight them on collective bargaining. We will fight them against the self-proclaimed elite. We will fight them against robots.
Minimum wage: The government forces employers to pay their employees enough for them to survive. Collective bargaining: The employees are allowed to argue for enough wages to survive, backed by the threat of organized civil disobedience or even outraged violence, a labor strike. Workers who do not comply with unionization do not receive jobs. Minimum wage is very similar to collective bargaining. In fact, in Sweden unions perform the function of the federal government in America, and Sweden has no minimum wage at all! I would prefer that America replaced its government with a federalized worker union, not a corporate oligarchy. That is in our best interests as the American people. The fascist Corporate world destroyed American Unions and then illegalized their strategic significance, like they did with weed. Look into a private espionage agency called the Pinkerton Institute. You will be amazed with the departure from whatever freedom was supposed to mean.
Proof that the NSA is nothing new. The only way to restore Unions would be to create a secret society where promotion is governed by the use of a reliable polygraph machine. This is to ensure that private military grade intelligence services are not employed by the corporate world in order to bust the workers' attempts to defend our interests. Then we hope they can't beat our polygraph! So we need to find a reliable one. I think EEG thought reading and mind mapping look like a good way to do it. So we see how his brain is used to move his body, and we take over that process from the current executive function. If we can apply this idea towards ensuring the loyalty of our followers, like with complete loss of information privacy. Memory access would be involved.
It's pretty bad trying to encrypt our information transfer the hard and obsolete way, without sufficient polygraph technology. The NSA has cracked all of humanity's formal encryption ability. So computer encryption is out of the question! You would have to write your own cipher.
I am currently working on one, but I don't know how long it's going to take me. It might take me years, as I do not have enough perquisite training to answer the question expediently. I'm reading an intermediate level text on computer systems, as I want a strong foundation. I would need to know what I'm doing so as to create a logically perfect encryption algorithm, one with decidedly no backdoor.
Then I could simply put it up on the internet with a mathematical proof of its working, and the gig would be up. Telepathy would be discovered. The take home lesson? Telepathy works better than encryption, since ultimately you can simply extract the useful information from the human worker, if that's not protected at all. Workers have need, and I am not talking about tin foil hats exactly, to shield themselves against detrimental programming. And it must be done through exposure of telepathic communication. In order to do this, we must first develop a defense against having our minds read.
If you know anyone who has anything to do with neurophysics and the development of synthetic telepathy, you must convince this person, even if it is yourself, to develop such a defense for the good of all humanity.
I don't think the mind knows how to not think about something that is being talked about. The correct answers ought to simply flow into the machine. Or at least an honest perspective, which is all our big ideas like Justice even care about.
Subtract out the base minimum living cost for the median American worker from his expected earnings, and consider the new value a more meaningful income value. This is what is known as net earnings.
wage - rent - vehicle - tax - food - basic utilities (including cell phone) -security*= net earnings
* Security needs include formal protection against violent crime. But it also requires an adversarial check on security forces, like community police that regulate the official police forces, so that any one community will not be forced to abide by the laws governing the whole land. It also requires non-intrusive protection against psychic manipulation. Together,this would ensure a democratic audit of the government. We need our own army. And it needs to be populated with the wealth of a great many workers. Otherwise, we will receive insufficient disposable income from the collective net earnings to voice our opinion politically.
Our collective net earnings = the number of participating individual workers * the pittance value.
We need to change the political system from fascism to radical socialism. And we need to do so quickly! It may already be too late!
Yes, that is one of our basic needs, and we need it to survive.
Your net earnings are what you've earned after you've paid a basic living expense that cover your basic needs, such as food, shelter, air, water, and safety and health. I think you'll find that the median net earnings are a pittance value compared against the net earnings of a CEO, who earns 300x the wage of a standard worker, who is probably suffering just as much working at that necessary position. A CEO's net earnings can be tens of thousands of times greater than a worker's net earnings. We will fight them against the King. We will fight them on collective bargaining. We will fight them against the self-proclaimed elite. We will fight them against robots.
Minimum wage: The government forces employers to pay their employees enough for them to survive. Collective bargaining: The employees are allowed to argue for enough wages to survive, backed by the threat of organized civil disobedience or even outraged violence, a labor strike. Workers who do not comply with unionization do not receive jobs. Minimum wage is very similar to collective bargaining. In fact, in Sweden unions perform the function of the federal government in America, and Sweden has no minimum wage at all! I would prefer that America replaced its government with a federalized worker union, not a corporate oligarchy. That is in our best interests as the American people. The fascist Corporate world destroyed American Unions and then illegalized their strategic significance, like they did with weed. Look into a private espionage agency called the Pinkerton Institute. You will be amazed with the departure from whatever freedom was supposed to mean.
Proof that the NSA is nothing new. The only way to restore Unions would be to create a secret society where promotion is governed by the use of a reliable polygraph machine. This is to ensure that private military grade intelligence services are not employed by the corporate world in order to bust the workers' attempts to defend our interests. Then we hope they can't beat our polygraph! So we need to find a reliable one. I think EEG thought reading and mind mapping look like a good way to do it. So we see how his brain is used to move his body, and we take over that process from the current executive function. If we can apply this idea towards ensuring the loyalty of our followers, like with complete loss of information privacy. Memory access would be involved.
It's pretty bad trying to encrypt our information transfer the hard and obsolete way, without sufficient polygraph technology. The NSA has cracked all of humanity's formal encryption ability. So computer encryption is out of the question! You would have to write your own cipher.
I am currently working on one, but I don't know how long it's going to take me. It might take me years, as I do not have enough perquisite training to answer the question expediently. I'm reading an intermediate level text on computer systems, as I want a strong foundation. I would need to know what I'm doing so as to create a logically perfect encryption algorithm, one with decidedly no backdoor.
Then I could simply put it up on the internet with a mathematical proof of its working, and the gig would be up. Telepathy would be discovered. The take home lesson? Telepathy works better than encryption, since ultimately you can simply extract the useful information from the human worker, if that's not protected at all. Workers have need, and I am not talking about tin foil hats exactly, to shield themselves against detrimental programming. And it must be done through exposure of telepathic communication. In order to do this, we must first develop a defense against having our minds read.
If you know anyone who has anything to do with neurophysics and the development of synthetic telepathy, you must convince this person, even if it is yourself, to develop such a defense for the good of all humanity.
I don't think the mind knows how to not think about something that is being talked about. The correct answers ought to simply flow into the machine. Or at least an honest perspective, which is all our big ideas like Justice even care about.
Saturday, March 28, 2015
Westershire: Cheap Peanuts for The Masses pt. 2
That last statement pulled both men out of their pleasant reveries. Gaelor remembered his business manners, straightened his cotton vest, and pulled up his chin.
"Right, of course. So what brings you here today, Mr. Farmer?"
"Well, I've got a full load of peanuts, lying in the 'ole cart back there. Are you still buying at the same price?"
"A copper piece a tentame, like usual. No fluctuations in demand at the marketplace. Loxim says all his parchments add up just right. I'll bring out the scale."
"Right, of course. So what brings you here today, Mr. Farmer?"
"Well, I've got a full load of peanuts, lying in the 'ole cart back there. Are you still buying at the same price?"
"A copper piece a tentame, like usual. No fluctuations in demand at the marketplace. Loxim says all his parchments add up just right. I'll bring out the scale."
Mr. Breckerstone practically skipped through the door to his back office, excited to grab his shiny new brass scale, which he had recently purchased from Farnan the Smith. Meanwhile, Gregory Farmer strolled out to haul a heaping sack of freshly harvested peanuts from the back of his cart. He lugged the sack over his left shoulder and tottered unevenly back into the shop. He made a mental note to visit to Ranjan later, to see if the carpenter could build a small wooden dolly, this time one with wheels. Or maybe he would just buy some smaller sacks. Back inside the shop, he met Gaelor finishing his calibration with the metal blocks you had to buy from Lord Tame.
"Excellent, just bring those over here, Greg; I've got it all evened out for a tentame."
Greg observed the apparatus, which had a tentame block on one side, sealed with the Lord's brand, and a wooden cup on the other, which from experience both parties knew held about a tentame of peanuts. Everything looked solid, so Farmer heaved his bag onto the counter and untied the twine holding it closed at the top. He poured a good amount into the cup. Critical hit, it was perfect.
"Allright, Greg, that's one", said Gaelor, "let me just pour that into my bag over here and make a tally on my chart. You want a copy as usual, right? Ok, let me just make a tally on this copy over here, as well. And let's go ahead and measure the next tentame.
This process continued all day long, with Greg bringing sacks of dirty peanuts into the shop, and Gaelor helping him to measure them out, very carefully. By sunset, both parchments were full of tallies, Greg's cart was empty, and Gaelor's backroom was full of fresh peanuts. Greg took his tally sheet; Gaelor took his own. They both agreed on the same number, one-hundred and thirty tentames.
Gaelor handed Greg a glittering gold piece and three shiny silver coins. Both were exhausted, and the oxen needed to be fed. The journey home would feel long, but it still wasn't as bad as digging in the dirt all day, collecting the crop. Greg took his coins, placed them in a small velvet sack, and stood up. It was time to go home.
Friday, March 27, 2015
Westershire: Cheap Peanuts for The Masses pt. 1
Once upon a time, there lived a humble peanut farmer in the rolling plains of Westershire. His name was Gregory Farmer, and he served the noble Lord Chipper Tame. Greg occupied a pleasant wooden cottage on the edge of a three acre plot, within whose borders he felt safe; he delivered a small, discrete velvet sack of golden coins to Lord Tame on the third of each tenday.
Now, not thirty minutes away by oxen-driven cart, a modestly sized shop stood. On a sunny Fourthsday afternoon, Mr. Gaelor Breckerstone might be found there behind a finely crafted wooden counter, tallying marks on a piece of parchment and waiting to be noticed. This was one such Fourthsday, and Greg Farmer was just stepping off his cart. He fed each of his two oxen a single sugar cube. They were a little pricey, but these were study and hard-working oxen. Gaelor looked up as he heard the pleasant lowing that resulted from this treatment.
Gregory walked into the shop, and he said, "Blessings of Tymora upon you, Mr. Breckerstone. How are the wife and kids?"
Gaelor smiled amiably, "Oh you know how it is, Greg. The wife always wants a new dress, and my daughter needs that popular adventurer toy."
Everyone knew everyone in Westershire. Greg's mind filled with nostalgic thoughts about his own daughter, Lizzy, her face covered in dirt, running into the cottage, followed closely by Fran, Gaelor's pretty little girl. That was a rainy Sixthsday, some months ago, and his wife had been horribly upset about needing to mop up all that mud. Covertly, Gaelor enjoyed the commotion.
"Oh, yes, of course she does. I think I heard a rumor or two about those whittled masterpieces. Ranjan the Carpenter started making those at his shop, isn't that right? And Julius the Tailor now sells little vials of dye and feather paintbrushes so the kids can personalize those things. I haven't seen either character in ages. Anyway, let's get down to business."
Now, not thirty minutes away by oxen-driven cart, a modestly sized shop stood. On a sunny Fourthsday afternoon, Mr. Gaelor Breckerstone might be found there behind a finely crafted wooden counter, tallying marks on a piece of parchment and waiting to be noticed. This was one such Fourthsday, and Greg Farmer was just stepping off his cart. He fed each of his two oxen a single sugar cube. They were a little pricey, but these were study and hard-working oxen. Gaelor looked up as he heard the pleasant lowing that resulted from this treatment.
Gregory walked into the shop, and he said, "Blessings of Tymora upon you, Mr. Breckerstone. How are the wife and kids?"
Gaelor smiled amiably, "Oh you know how it is, Greg. The wife always wants a new dress, and my daughter needs that popular adventurer toy."
Everyone knew everyone in Westershire. Greg's mind filled with nostalgic thoughts about his own daughter, Lizzy, her face covered in dirt, running into the cottage, followed closely by Fran, Gaelor's pretty little girl. That was a rainy Sixthsday, some months ago, and his wife had been horribly upset about needing to mop up all that mud. Covertly, Gaelor enjoyed the commotion.
"Oh, yes, of course she does. I think I heard a rumor or two about those whittled masterpieces. Ranjan the Carpenter started making those at his shop, isn't that right? And Julius the Tailor now sells little vials of dye and feather paintbrushes so the kids can personalize those things. I haven't seen either character in ages. Anyway, let's get down to business."
Thursday, March 26, 2015
Crime Really Doesn't Pay, After All
Can coercively seizing someone's information without just cause be considered assault, for example by threatening to put someone in a situation that revokes their financial security if they do not hand over their birthdate, DL number, address, and full legal name? If so, I just got assaulted and then fired for attempting to figure out how to defend myself against this work of structural violence. Now today, I feel insecure that an untrusted entity has taken so much information about me, photocopied it, and put it in a database, all without my willful consent.
And I need a new job. Who's hiring? On the bright side, all this has given me incredible insight into identity theft.
So, let's say hypothetically I've invented a somewhat risky (though honestly people are retarded so not that risky) scheme to steal about 50k/year from the 1%. It's hugely convoluted and would probably entail the equivalent of a full-time job in labor hours. But then I went onto match.com and discovered that physicians make at least 200k/year, or like 120k/year after taxes. Let's give myself a 20k/year cushion, even though this is more than the median personal income. That pays for medical school or whatever. I'm also grossly underestimating salary*.
So, from this data, I can conclude that working as a physician produces about 2x as much, at least, as my incredibly clever scheme to "arbitrage" the 1% market, if you will. And it's not even a tested procedure. Then, logically, every hour I would work as a doctor would take more from society than a hour of determined labor as an identity thief. Gee, I wonder why all the ultra-smart identity thieves don't just become doctors instead?
Or for that matter, why don't black people in the hood become medical assistants instead of marijuana footsoldiers, since these each pay about equally. I think Marco Rubio should go to a project in Detroit and fucking ask that question. God dammit.
Instead, there's all this shady research on how black people are genetically violent criminals. Well, maybe not. Maybe being a criminal simply paid more than working at McDonald's. After all, I would reasonably expect a slum-negro to jump at the chance at making 50k/year reading radiology charts rather than dodging armed troops and trying to sell chemical happiness.
*Estimated Physician Salary
And I need a new job. Who's hiring? On the bright side, all this has given me incredible insight into identity theft.
So, let's say hypothetically I've invented a somewhat risky (though honestly people are retarded so not that risky) scheme to steal about 50k/year from the 1%. It's hugely convoluted and would probably entail the equivalent of a full-time job in labor hours. But then I went onto match.com and discovered that physicians make at least 200k/year, or like 120k/year after taxes. Let's give myself a 20k/year cushion, even though this is more than the median personal income. That pays for medical school or whatever. I'm also grossly underestimating salary*.
So, from this data, I can conclude that working as a physician produces about 2x as much, at least, as my incredibly clever scheme to "arbitrage" the 1% market, if you will. And it's not even a tested procedure. Then, logically, every hour I would work as a doctor would take more from society than a hour of determined labor as an identity thief. Gee, I wonder why all the ultra-smart identity thieves don't just become doctors instead?
Or for that matter, why don't black people in the hood become medical assistants instead of marijuana footsoldiers, since these each pay about equally. I think Marco Rubio should go to a project in Detroit and fucking ask that question. God dammit.
Instead, there's all this shady research on how black people are genetically violent criminals. Well, maybe not. Maybe being a criminal simply paid more than working at McDonald's. After all, I would reasonably expect a slum-negro to jump at the chance at making 50k/year reading radiology charts rather than dodging armed troops and trying to sell chemical happiness.
*Estimated Physician Salary
Sunday, March 22, 2015
Ghostwriter: The Unpublished Marvel
Read this very carefully to find out exactly what happens to a genius who wasn't born rich. Click. Read. Learn. Enjoy your sarcastic Deity.
Let me help you out with this one; if he's writing books for some of the smartest CEO's in business, then he's probably smarter than all of them. Or else why didn't they write their own books? They didn't have time? Well, how did this guy find time working fiendishly at a book plant managing 250 people, perhaps without even having a college degree. Or is that where all his extra time came from? And trust me, all along the way, people were trying to get him fired. He's so smart he was a threat to management.
Saturday, March 21, 2015
Outrageous Shipping Costs
Want to know how much it actually costs to ship an item to you, versus how much a company is charging? Click on the pictures to zoom in. I actually feel very sad for all the people who are trying to compete with Amazon right now, but it's not good to lose money.
I also checked Texas and Michigan; they were the same price. So, why do they even make me enter a zip code if it's a fucking flat rate shipping cost? Well, here's why:
Let's do a quick calculation. 5.42 - 2.50 = 2.92. So, basically, dCables is trying to charge me 50% the total item cost in order to put it in a box, slap a sticker with my address on it, and put it in the mail. I think not. Time to go to Amazon.com again.
Update: Amazon.com had a prime deal that included a charger kit, which can also be used in the car or in Europe, screen protectors, and a microfiber pad all for less than the charger on dCables.com. God I love-hate Capitalism.
Price to ship a camera battery charger to Oregon
Price to ship a camera battery to Florida, from the same site.
I also checked Texas and Michigan; they were the same price. So, why do they even make me enter a zip code if it's a fucking flat rate shipping cost? Well, here's why:
Actual price to ship the same camera battery, from Oregon to Florida, or across the entire country.
Let's do a quick calculation. 5.42 - 2.50 = 2.92. So, basically, dCables is trying to charge me 50% the total item cost in order to put it in a box, slap a sticker with my address on it, and put it in the mail. I think not. Time to go to Amazon.com again.
Update: Amazon.com had a prime deal that included a charger kit, which can also be used in the car or in Europe, screen protectors, and a microfiber pad all for less than the charger on dCables.com. God I love-hate Capitalism.
Saturday, March 14, 2015
So You Want To Read My Diary? Well, That's Going To Cost You
I recently became aware that I've generated a few subscribers by being awesome. Apparently ya'll find me sufficiently interesting to read my bantering thoughts. Amazing. I love it. But now I'm going to try to make money off it.
You may have noticed the ads that just appeared on my blog. That's no accident, baby! Please click on them. Actually, please copy-paste my blog URL, open like 10 tabs, bring up my blog on every tab, and click through the ad on each tab. And buy stuff you don't need, of course. I know I do. I just bought this:
I mean, like seriously, I have a problem. It's bad, but therapists just aren't trained to handle something like this.
And if you really like what I have to say, here's the QQminusS quote of the day!
You may have noticed the ads that just appeared on my blog. That's no accident, baby! Please click on them. Actually, please copy-paste my blog URL, open like 10 tabs, bring up my blog on every tab, and click through the ad on each tab. And buy stuff you don't need, of course. I know I do. I just bought this:
[Does not insert hints here]
I mean, like seriously, I have a problem. It's bad, but therapists just aren't trained to handle something like this.
And if you really like what I have to say, here's the QQminusS quote of the day!
"Racism doesn't discriminate; it persecutes anyone who is different."
- A random pizza-delivering genius, circa 2015
Click on enough ads, and I'll reward you by explaining the origin of my now notorious moniker!
Update: So far, no clicks. Dang!
Update: So far, no clicks. Dang!
Friday, March 13, 2015
DnD Empire Time!
I have another idea. I am a talented Dungeons and Dragons DM. I want to start a company on meetup.com that sells tickets to a DnD game for only $10. I could have four open seats per game to actually make this worth my time. And I'll host a game once a week.
Problematically, most people would rather just play Mass Effect or watch Netflix, which they can do all month long for the cost of a single game. That's why I set the price so low.
But ok. Let's say this works, and I want to expand to actually make enough money to live on, instead of less than the cheapest rent in my area per month. Now I have to split my earnings with a professionally trained DM, and I figure I have to pay him at least about $15/hour, since being a DM requires intelligence. (He's basically a story-teller.) Anything less, and how am I going to attract people who can research campaigns, memorize characters, environments, and regulate individual player experiences? It needs to be fun, and this individual must also possess good social skills.
I make about that much an hour delivering pizza. So it's not like he has no where else to go.
Games last 2 hours. Now I'm making $10/week/game, minus cost of supplies, marketing, and other corporate expenditures. I'll probably need at least about 20 games/week to make enough to live on. That's too big to start out. How will I account for all the logistical contingencies? In order to initiate this company and slowly grow it, I'll either have to charge more or pay the DM's less. Perhaps I can find DM's who will do this for free just because they like it and claim all my earnings as suggested donations, until I grow large enough...
(That's how the corporate system works. I may make small margins, but with a league including thousands of players, where N = league size and N/4 * 10 = expected weekly earnings + cost of materials, with a large enough N, I can make bank! Unfortunately, most people aren't that nerdy, so my entire target audience for recruitment into my league in this area probably doesn't justify creating the company.)
Mem: Find a way to brainwash people into loving DnD. Stupid Christians. Ted Haggard can go fuck himself in his own ass. That would enlarge the target audience. It's called "marketing," and it basically means creating your own demand.
Note: I'm bitching about this, but I still haven't given up on it! I WILL make DnD America's new favorite pastime! Fuck baseball.
Update: I just printed this out, and I'm about to drive over to the game store to see if I can work with them to do the marketing and make this happen.
Problematically, most people would rather just play Mass Effect or watch Netflix, which they can do all month long for the cost of a single game. That's why I set the price so low.
But ok. Let's say this works, and I want to expand to actually make enough money to live on, instead of less than the cheapest rent in my area per month. Now I have to split my earnings with a professionally trained DM, and I figure I have to pay him at least about $15/hour, since being a DM requires intelligence. (He's basically a story-teller.) Anything less, and how am I going to attract people who can research campaigns, memorize characters, environments, and regulate individual player experiences? It needs to be fun, and this individual must also possess good social skills.
I make about that much an hour delivering pizza. So it's not like he has no where else to go.
Games last 2 hours. Now I'm making $10/week/game, minus cost of supplies, marketing, and other corporate expenditures. I'll probably need at least about 20 games/week to make enough to live on. That's too big to start out. How will I account for all the logistical contingencies? In order to initiate this company and slowly grow it, I'll either have to charge more or pay the DM's less. Perhaps I can find DM's who will do this for free just because they like it and claim all my earnings as suggested donations, until I grow large enough...
(That's how the corporate system works. I may make small margins, but with a league including thousands of players, where N = league size and N/4 * 10 = expected weekly earnings + cost of materials, with a large enough N, I can make bank! Unfortunately, most people aren't that nerdy, so my entire target audience for recruitment into my league in this area probably doesn't justify creating the company.)
Mem: Find a way to brainwash people into loving DnD. Stupid Christians. Ted Haggard can go fuck himself in his own ass. That would enlarge the target audience. It's called "marketing," and it basically means creating your own demand.
Note: I'm bitching about this, but I still haven't given up on it! I WILL make DnD America's new favorite pastime! Fuck baseball.
Update: I just printed this out, and I'm about to drive over to the game store to see if I can work with them to do the marketing and make this happen.
Little Known Fact: Capitalists and Men Both Actually Hate, Hate, Hate Competition
So, I was thinking about becoming an entrepreneur. That's the spirit, right? You just need a good idea, work ethic, some smarts, and off you go to wealth and success. Well, no. Here's my idea: I want to create a company that produces vitamin-enriched, low-sodium, vegetarian pizza with a vegan option. That's a great idea, right? Ok.
Remember that girl who got arrested for trying to sell lemonade at a lemonade stand, since Wal-Mart believed this was a serious threat to their high-fructose empire? Or from my personal experience, I remember this Hispanic boy when I was a freshman in high school. He was a smart kid; we both got into honors literature and were studying the book 1984. Keep in mind that a few years before, this guy was in Mexico and spoke no English.
Well, I remember him complaining about his brother's arrest, who along with several people he knew in the community, were detained at a local park for trying to sell hand-crafted kites. I distinctly recall his frustration with the difference between his former conception of American freedom and the reality of American Capitalism. It was the difference between a country where talented craftsmen could create a unique cultural product and sell it without an overwhelmingly destructive barrier to entry, for example from a cart at the park, and a country where Wal-Mart calls the police to ensure that no one is competing with their cheap plastic bullshit for only $2 more.
And what about my nutritious vegan pizza idea? People don't want that, either. There's no demand for it. People are only as demanding as they are creative, and trust me; they aren't creative. Market research shows that people only want salty, disgusting, greasy pizza. The government refuses to regulate it because of all the lobbying money being spent by the pizza industry in D.C., both frozen and delivery. And even if I could somehow brainwash people with an ultra effective revolutionary marketing campaign to make them want better pizza, the existing industry would probably levy the police forces against me in order to shut me down, just like my Hispanic friend from high school.
I'm sure the regulatory system governing the pizza industry is hopelessly complex in every way except regarding creating healthier pizza, mostly to disguise the fact that the American dream is total bullshit.
Proof That You Need Millions of Dollars To Compete In The Pizza Industry
Bloomberg reveals the claim that pizza is special; it's not. It's just a prominent example. So yes, he's biased. But you know what? At least he's a decent guy. And at least he didn't make his money by accepting bribes from the pizza industry and then claiming it was all because he worked so hard, like Mitt Romney.
Remember that girl who got arrested for trying to sell lemonade at a lemonade stand, since Wal-Mart believed this was a serious threat to their high-fructose empire? Or from my personal experience, I remember this Hispanic boy when I was a freshman in high school. He was a smart kid; we both got into honors literature and were studying the book 1984. Keep in mind that a few years before, this guy was in Mexico and spoke no English.
Well, I remember him complaining about his brother's arrest, who along with several people he knew in the community, were detained at a local park for trying to sell hand-crafted kites. I distinctly recall his frustration with the difference between his former conception of American freedom and the reality of American Capitalism. It was the difference between a country where talented craftsmen could create a unique cultural product and sell it without an overwhelmingly destructive barrier to entry, for example from a cart at the park, and a country where Wal-Mart calls the police to ensure that no one is competing with their cheap plastic bullshit for only $2 more.
And what about my nutritious vegan pizza idea? People don't want that, either. There's no demand for it. People are only as demanding as they are creative, and trust me; they aren't creative. Market research shows that people only want salty, disgusting, greasy pizza. The government refuses to regulate it because of all the lobbying money being spent by the pizza industry in D.C., both frozen and delivery. And even if I could somehow brainwash people with an ultra effective revolutionary marketing campaign to make them want better pizza, the existing industry would probably levy the police forces against me in order to shut me down, just like my Hispanic friend from high school.
I'm sure the regulatory system governing the pizza industry is hopelessly complex in every way except regarding creating healthier pizza, mostly to disguise the fact that the American dream is total bullshit.
Proof That You Need Millions of Dollars To Compete In The Pizza Industry
Bloomberg reveals the claim that pizza is special; it's not. It's just a prominent example. So yes, he's biased. But you know what? At least he's a decent guy. And at least he didn't make his money by accepting bribes from the pizza industry and then claiming it was all because he worked so hard, like Mitt Romney.
Look, the little girl lemonade criminal syndicate became a meme!
Thursday, March 12, 2015
Nanny Pimpin' Ain't Easy
Some of you may be a little interested to see what this guy would write when trying to woo the woman of his dreams on match dot com. Just what was I able to get past the moderators? So, for example, they took down my STD test results. But what were they like, "ok, whatever man, " about? Fear not! What kind of real man would I be if I denied you that answer? Let's begin with the last paragraph, since it sort of resolves my entire issue with dating sites in general:
"Market price for a live-in nanny is around $300/week. If it were our child, I would do it for free (though hopefully be able to hire said nanny). If it's some other idiot's kid, forget it! Also, if you are just looking for money, you are doing it wrong; escorts can make anywhere between $100/hour and around $4,000 per night. With that much money you can pay the live-in nanny and forgo the complication of living with someone you do not love."
That's right. I'm looking for a lucky lady who can read this, interpret it, agree with it, and still be interested in the author. And guess what? I have a date this Monday. What else? I know she's for real. Did I pique your interest? Ok, here's the full profile:
I am a bit of a loner. I suppose that is the cost of being a free-thinker. But I love people, and I work a job that requires customer service skills, which I possess amply. Some people think I'm funny. I really dislike elitism and love people who just want to live and be happy. I believe I am handsome and enjoy things that are beautiful. I believe communication skills are very important. Passion and positivity are two qualities that go well independently or together. I like to be around people who think positive things about me, and I think that's true for most if not all people. "I thrive on change, and know how to capitalize on it. It is important that I have enough change and variety. I derive personal satisfaction from directly helping others. I naturally see the links, relationships and patterns between different ideas. I see the "big picture." I have a creative imagination and am gifted at using words (verbally and/or in writing) to express new ideas, concepts or plots. I can be called on when a fresh, new way to communicate important information is needed. I am motivated to cause good, growth and gain in the lives of others. I am also insightful as to the personality, intentions, emotions, ethics, values, and moods of people. I am effective in helping to develop other employees or interacting with customers. I am naturally curious about how things work. I can help uncover possibilities." "The MAPP test has undergone extensive validity and reliability testing by a number of psychologists, including correlating the results to the Strong Interest Inventory®. Reliability studies also indicate that the MAPP test is consistent over time." So, it's not the most romantic thing ever, but it indicates some scientifically validated qualities that I possess, which might be better than my mouthing off whatever I want you to believe about me. Also, I just bought my best friend's significant other a birthday present, and she really liked it. I think this means I am considerate. :) P.S. I am a vegetarian, and I'm interested in women who are loving and care about animals. "I recently discovered that I'm about 1% Jewish, and I'm confident I have a Jewish 3rd cousin. So let that be the 1% that speaks, and consider me a self-hating Jew. Because we all know that the 1% is the only percent that matters, anyway." "I think the real question is, "Has Elizabeth Warren actually done anything to help the Native Americans?" They live in forgotten squalor, and no one gives a [----] about them. So what about their mighty representative in the Senate? What does she do to defend the people who enabled her success?" I scored a 35 on the MCAT and had a 3.72 GPA at Emory, and I was supposed to be a medical doctor. But I alienated the elite by pointing out how racist they are with statements like these. Now I deliver pizzas. I have a few business ideas in the works, however, and I don't expect to stay down forever. Also, being a pizza delivery guy is actually a pretty good job. Thanks a million, Mr. Schnatter. I like Jewish girls; they are smart and conscientious. But obviously I mean ancestry and upbringing and not religion or race. The most important quality a woman can have is the ability to love. Market price for a live-in nanny is around $300/week. If it were our child, I would do it for free (though hopefully be able to hire said nanny). If it's some other idiot's kid, forget it! Also, if you are just looking for money, you are doing it wrong; escorts can make anywhere between $100/hour and around $4,000 per night. With that much money you can pay the live-in nanny and forgo the complication of living with someone you do not love.
Nanny Pimpin' Ain't Easy
Update: The match dot com staff just discovered that I wrote this and promptly removed it. I've added it again in the hopes that a different team member reviews and approves of it. This is why gender diversity is good in any position, even match dot com moderation jobs.
"Market price for a live-in nanny is around $300/week. If it were our child, I would do it for free (though hopefully be able to hire said nanny). If it's some other idiot's kid, forget it! Also, if you are just looking for money, you are doing it wrong; escorts can make anywhere between $100/hour and around $4,000 per night. With that much money you can pay the live-in nanny and forgo the complication of living with someone you do not love."
That's right. I'm looking for a lucky lady who can read this, interpret it, agree with it, and still be interested in the author. And guess what? I have a date this Monday. What else? I know she's for real. Did I pique your interest? Ok, here's the full profile:
I am a bit of a loner. I suppose that is the cost of being a free-thinker. But I love people, and I work a job that requires customer service skills, which I possess amply. Some people think I'm funny. I really dislike elitism and love people who just want to live and be happy. I believe I am handsome and enjoy things that are beautiful. I believe communication skills are very important. Passion and positivity are two qualities that go well independently or together. I like to be around people who think positive things about me, and I think that's true for most if not all people. "I thrive on change, and know how to capitalize on it. It is important that I have enough change and variety. I derive personal satisfaction from directly helping others. I naturally see the links, relationships and patterns between different ideas. I see the "big picture." I have a creative imagination and am gifted at using words (verbally and/or in writing) to express new ideas, concepts or plots. I can be called on when a fresh, new way to communicate important information is needed. I am motivated to cause good, growth and gain in the lives of others. I am also insightful as to the personality, intentions, emotions, ethics, values, and moods of people. I am effective in helping to develop other employees or interacting with customers. I am naturally curious about how things work. I can help uncover possibilities." "The MAPP test has undergone extensive validity and reliability testing by a number of psychologists, including correlating the results to the Strong Interest Inventory®. Reliability studies also indicate that the MAPP test is consistent over time." So, it's not the most romantic thing ever, but it indicates some scientifically validated qualities that I possess, which might be better than my mouthing off whatever I want you to believe about me. Also, I just bought my best friend's significant other a birthday present, and she really liked it. I think this means I am considerate. :) P.S. I am a vegetarian, and I'm interested in women who are loving and care about animals. "I recently discovered that I'm about 1% Jewish, and I'm confident I have a Jewish 3rd cousin. So let that be the 1% that speaks, and consider me a self-hating Jew. Because we all know that the 1% is the only percent that matters, anyway." "I think the real question is, "Has Elizabeth Warren actually done anything to help the Native Americans?" They live in forgotten squalor, and no one gives a [----] about them. So what about their mighty representative in the Senate? What does she do to defend the people who enabled her success?" I scored a 35 on the MCAT and had a 3.72 GPA at Emory, and I was supposed to be a medical doctor. But I alienated the elite by pointing out how racist they are with statements like these. Now I deliver pizzas. I have a few business ideas in the works, however, and I don't expect to stay down forever. Also, being a pizza delivery guy is actually a pretty good job. Thanks a million, Mr. Schnatter. I like Jewish girls; they are smart and conscientious. But obviously I mean ancestry and upbringing and not religion or race. The most important quality a woman can have is the ability to love. Market price for a live-in nanny is around $300/week. If it were our child, I would do it for free (though hopefully be able to hire said nanny). If it's some other idiot's kid, forget it! Also, if you are just looking for money, you are doing it wrong; escorts can make anywhere between $100/hour and around $4,000 per night. With that much money you can pay the live-in nanny and forgo the complication of living with someone you do not love.
Nanny Pimpin' Ain't Easy
Update: The match dot com staff just discovered that I wrote this and promptly removed it. I've added it again in the hopes that a different team member reviews and approves of it. This is why gender diversity is good in any position, even match dot com moderation jobs.
Saturday, March 7, 2015
Guess Who's Coming to Match.com
Oh yeah, baby! That's right. Ladies please, restrain yourselves. I know it's hard. But I'm now on match.com for your perusal.
| Test (Req #9101354) | Value | Range | Result | Test Date | Results Date |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Hepatitis C | <0 .1="" td=""> | 0.0-0.9 | Negative | 03/04/2015 | 03/05/2015 |
| HIV-1 Antibody | <1 .00="" td=""> | <1 .00="" td=""> | Negative | 03/04/2015 | 03/05/2015 |
| HIV 1/O/2 Abs, Qual | Non Reactive | Non Reactive | Negative | 03/04/2015 | 03/05/2015 |
I put this in my profile initially, but the match.com staff removed it. I was a little disappointed, as I thought these results were valuable information for a dating site. I wish all the women would do the same.
I have oh so subtly seduced them with the thought of being like this subject of my material affections; I posted a link to the gift I bought my best friend's significant other for her birthday.
.
http://amzn.to/1x3Qn1J
"Just think. That could be you. :) "
Unfortunately, the match.com staff removed these links that I had hoped would tantalize my potential female lover with fantasies of my doting affection.
So far, no women have seemed in the least bit interested except a Russian woman who is a little bit too old for me and already has a child. So maybe if she pays me to help take care of her kid. I'm a very good mother, I think.
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I think you’ll find that the “suits upstairs” have made this nearly impossible. But there’s a “living wage” calculator at MIT that’s
better than nothing. Other than that, the US government censors basically anything except cost of living indexes, which are relative.
If the value is negative, you are earning less than a slave would. Congratulations, chattel slaves make more money than you do. The positive value is the money you can spend on free choices, including more expensive substitutes (like a residence bigger than an inexpensive studio.)
2) are reasonably likely to hire you as an anonymous individual with related academics or other basic demonstrated interest.